What I suppose to do this late?

Thai boy with Bangkok Pride’s rainbow flag

Tonite,, I still not sleep… It is 3 am. alread. I am tired, but can’t sleep because I took a nap in evening.

I shaved my pubs in the morning and I spent all day with internet, watch cartoon, eating and just do it all like a cycle.

The cartoon I watched was Doraemon,,, old Japanese cartoon that I had for my collection. Quite fun 🙂

But the thing that I still feel in everyday,,, still in my mind,,, like a scar in my heart….that not yet recovered and waiting something or time to heal this wound. I still feel loney,, no matter how many people I chat with,,, no matter that I just went to see my friends, but when I get back home,, I feel so apart from this world,, it’s too lonely. Do I really need someone? (I have to answer myself “Yes, I really do”)

Sometime I think I should open for anyone more and more,, I thought I did though,,, but somehow I feel I am not ready for that since I scared I will hurt again… I scared I will fall in love too deep too fast like I used to be. I don’t wanna do anything rush when I feel lonely.

Too bad I like only white guy and English language is only way I can communicate with them. Too bad almost guys I like are American. Too bad the guy I like not like me. Too bad I can’t be happy by myself yet.

I wish I can forget all things that made me hurt and be happy with it as my experience,, those tought me my life. But I knew I almost forget how I used my life in USA,, I like it no matter I have some bad memory there. Something still beatiful, but I couldn’t get back anymore.

…and I still see love is beatiful… It’s very green to me.

See ya,
Tony

Temple,,, The wonderful architecture in Thailand

I remembered last 2 – 3 months ago, I took the Thai traditional massage classes at Wat Po (Don’t ask anything for now,, I almost forgot everything, Haha)

So Wat Po is beautiful Temple too, I didn’t take any photo for Wat Po because I was hurry to get in class in the morning and then too much tired in evening and get back home.


Wat Jaeng in Bangkok, Thailand

When I get back home, I had to took the boat (Closest way and fastest way to go from there) at Ta tien (Tien pier) so the Wat Jaeng (In the Opposit side of the river)

Both temples had a Giant,,, There is a tale about Wat Po’s giant and Wat Jang’s giant fighting until this area were flatted (Meaning ‘Tien’)

I have a chance to take this photo and came out good, so I make it black and white. I still have the original file if someone want it, I can give you. This photo will look very beautiful in the frame when hang at the wall.

See ya,
Tony

First time in Pattaya,, It’s not bad!

I decided to have my long weekend at Pattaya on last Thursday because I don’t wanna stay home bored! So I rang my uncle who lived and worked there.. Finally I was there on Saturday and have him picked me up at bus station.. He looks a bit different from last time I saw him (probably 4 – 5 years ago)

Then we went to his friend’s room and relax there for a while then we moved to Jomtien beach. Oh damn it! It was rained!!!! Why it just rain when I want to have the nice weekend! We stucked in front of bathroom at Jomtien Beach. LOL so funny.

Then the rain is kind of small we moved quickly to Kaffa resturant.. Have some food and 2 bottles of beer.


It was rained again when we were in resturant.. So hard and long. When the rain stopped, we get back to my uncle’s house and shower and will go out for dinner and bar.

What the hell… Rain again… but not hard so we still go to have dinner (by motorcycle) . After dinner, we went to discotheque, Pattaya Hollywood, and I just didn’t bring camera, but here is pics from my phone.

We planed to go to Koh Laan on Sunday,, Wow,, I never knew there is island close to Pattaya… The sea is more beautiful and the guys there is cute. LOL (Some Farang went there too) And never gone,,, rain again when we back to the coast.



Me on the boat


Look at water


A little bit sexy(or tummy?)


Okay okay. I agreed t o hide tummy.


When we get back,, we showered and get ready for dinner and bar… We went to Boyz zone and Panorama and then went to Walking street… Then move to some other bar and get back..

Then I leave Pattaya about 12.50pm 🙂
Good bye Pattaya
Tony

I am lonely…. hold me baby

Tired

Tonight I am feeling lonely
I was trying to stay busy
But it’s just only me…. and me
I don’t wanna be…… alone

I wanted someone understand me
The one that who nice born to be
Live with me ’till his last breath
And I will love him every beat.

It is enough for me to hurt
I can’t be like that anymore
I didn’t mean that love is bored
I just waiting for when I get over soon

See ya,
Tony

Where is my money!

I really hate to be in a bad money situation, like this and I really waiting for new salary coming. Mannn, last night I was dreamed about my boss gave me the salary earlier than it used to be. I was happy in my dream. 🙂

I was thinking about move to new place to decrease the rent cost. Probably I will find new place that cost me only half from right now. It doesn’t matter if live in bad environment.. It’s just in the central of city.. Everywhere are crowd of people. Cuz I have more bills to pay… Actually move to new place didn’t help much for that. Well,, but it help some… Also I will not have internet at home,,, I guess.

Too bad I am not wealth born. 🙂 but I am a good boy. God will send a good guy to be my husband and live with me forever either I just live alone with happy sometime.

Sometime I think it’s just my problem.. I can’t have help from anyone. I was stupid that made all debt and try to live with the one I loved…. and he didn’t love me.. whatever… So I need to stand by my legs and live with this all debt. LOL (Laught as bored)

See ya,
Tony

Good bye Mark :-)

Last Sat night,, I wish you enjoy pizza. LOL but I just didn’t know you don’t like seafood. So I wish you good luck with your life in Nepal.

And try to read Thai language and not forget. When you get back here you will be easy to learn more. 🙂

Thank you being my friend. Good luck.

See ya,
Tony

Friday night : Dinner with friend at OHO resturant!!

Well,, no pic this blog. LOL I need to put something else

I met a lot of people last night,, again 😛 We met at OHO resturant,, at Soi 1. I thought it close to Soi 11 so after work,, I just head to there by walking. Oh,, it’s quite too far to walk.. LOL

I won’t do that again.. LOL

and we talked and talked. I joined the table with Martin (Cute one) and Steve (Talk a lottt) and then another Thai guy come to join later, Mark.

I’d love to go out after dinner, but well it’s not good since my money situation so bad and also have laptop and backpack with me.

So I just go home and done laundry and chat some and fell asleep. wink wink

Here is O-HO resturant information:
O..Ho… Restaurant
2/8 Soi Sri Bumphen
Phone: (0) 2286-5292
Email: bertgerb@hotmail.com
Located just around the corner from the Malaysia Hotel, gay owned and operated fully licensed restaurant, air conditioned, Thai and Western a la carte menu, soft background music with mood lighting and stunningly decorated. Prices very reasonable, dishes from 40 – 190 Baht. Open from 9:00 AM til midnight (member discounts for dinner only).

See ya,
Tony